Men are from Mars & women are from Venus

It’s been many days I have been introspecting what should be the topic of my next blog. For a long time the answer didn’t come. Yesterday I saw a video on the book “Men are from mars and women are from Venus”. Watching the video I thought I can write a blog on this book .I had read this book four years back when I was studying for my master at Mumbai. Since then I have shared the ideas in the book with some of my friends & motivated few to buy this book and read it. Even though I am not an expert on this subjected I have noted my personal behavior over period of last four years. I found that I do in many ways behave similar to the way mentioned in the book. I always felt this book can be of tremendous help for men & women to better understand each other and in turn have great relationship.

In the book author mentions the fundamental problem with all of us is that we consider men & women to be same. But it is not, to make the book interesting and funny authors suggests Men came from Mars & women came from Venus on Earth. So they were entirely different species prior to meeting each other on Planet earth. But the differences in both attracted them to the other. Prior to this men were introvert, lonely, egoistic,selfish and lived in caves .Women were more social, caring,grooming and beautiful. On seeing women for first time men were excited and happy. It forced then to come out of their caves and be achievement driven. If there were no women, men would have never created anything.

Now I will explain the fundamental difference between men and women. As men are achievement driven they are always trying to satisfy male ego of being some one. They like to solve their problems by themselves .Most of the time men are thinking of the problems they are facing and figuring out the solution to these problems. When a man is encountered with a problem he goes into his shell or cave. He becomes very quite and doesn’t communicate much. This is normal behaviors for men. They come out of their cave and silence only after they have a solution to their problem .Taking help or advice from others is an absolute no for men. Asking for help or advice makes man think he is not competent. Being incompetent means a slow death for a man. If a man is not able to solve his problem then finally he will look for help from some one he considers better than him. But women never understand this nature of men. When a man goes quite she feels that he is ignoring her or doesn’t like her. Women being very caring and loving want to make their man happy .She gives suggestion to his problem. But getting suggestion without asking for it is an absolute no for most men. It makes a man feel the he is not trusted and the woman in his life feels he is not competent. One point women must take care of is, give suggestions & help to man only when he asks for it.Give him is space and let him alone when is is quite.

On the other hand women like to talk more and are more inclined towards relationship. They like to talk about their problems and like to share it with others. General thumb rule is women talk three times more than men.When a woman shares a problem with a man she is not expecting solution to her problem. For women it is more important to know that somebody is there to listen to them and care. But men always are in a Mr Fix it mode. Men always try to find a solution to any problem. So when a woman shares a problem with him, rather than listening to her he goes in a mode to solve her problem. So a woman feels that the man in her life doesn’t listen to her and doesn’t care for her. What men need to learn is to the art of actively listening to her problems .Once a man starts listening to woman, she feels very happy that her man listens to her and cares for her. Getting solution for her problem is less important that knowing somebody cares for her .Many men after office go home and put on TV or start reading news paper. This is their way of relaxing after long days toil. But this makes a woman feel that man in her life doesnt care for her and has no time for her. So what men should learn while interacting with women is to come out of Mr Fix mode and listen to women more.